Eliminate Perfectionism and Grow Authentically

by Kristen Carrington

Have you ever experienced the perfect day?


When the sun is shining, the sky is blue and the temperature is the perfect temperature for you. The sound of birds chirping, the warm light breeze blowing, and delicious nourishing food that feels satisfying to eat. The kind of day that you never want to end.


And yet, like all things, tomorrow brings a new day, which may no longer be perfect.


Trying to be perfect in life is like trying to hold onto that perfect day, every day. It’s just not realistic. At some point, the outer layer of perfectionism will become stressed and crack, and what is underneath will become exposed. 


The question is, do you like who is underneath?

Authenticity is knowing who you are. It is knowing what you believe, knowing your values and living them purposefully each day at a time. Showing up authentically is the expression of these beliefs and values and living your truth.


But, what if you don’t know who that is anymore? What if, somewhere along the way, life took a turn and you no longer feel in touch with your authentic self?


When this happens, it is an indicator that you are simply living by default. You keep repeating the same patterns that are not aligned with whom you want to be as you grow.


If you don’t know how to be authentic it’s your opportunity to dive deeper into knowing who you are at your core, what you believe, and what you truly value.


Knowing who we are and what we believe can be elusive. As life presents changes, we need to consciously change with it.


“Knowing who you are is hard. Give yourself a break. Eliminate who you are not first, and you’ll find yourself where you need to be.” – Matthew McConaughey


If there is a place in your life where you are feeling stuck there may be a mismatch between where you are and where you want to be.


Authenticity requires deep exploration, self-examination, trial & error, and honesty.


A great place to start is being honest with yourself, first and foremost, to discover who you are not.

What area in my life am not feeling satisfied or fulfilled and desire change? Where am I putting my energy and am I rejuvenating myself or depleting myself?


Putting a pin in the map of where you are currently will help you pave the path for where you want to go.  

How am I currently showing up in my life? What am I avoiding? How do I want to show up?


Question limiting and toxic beliefs.

What are some of the toxic belief patterns that keep showing up? Do those beliefs support me on my journey or do they hold me back? What do I imagine I want to believe instead?


Explore your values.

What is important to me about (life, relationships, personal growth, etc.)? How am I living these values? How am I not?


Once you step into awareness and question who you are not, you have space and freedom to choose who you want to be.


Perfection is an unrealistic goal-post that is based on external measures. Authenticity is knowing who you are and showing up based on internal truths, sometimes in opposition to who others believe you to be.


“Change is inevitable, personal growth is a choice.” – Bob Proctor


Contrary to popular belief, you are not destined to be one way forever. The patterns and beliefs that keep you stuck are a signal that you are ready to grow and become more of who you are.


Exploring and understanding what makes you tick gives you the power to trust yourself, rely on yourself, have confidence in yourself and trust who you are. 


The cracks in the outer layer of perfection reveal the beauty that is inside of you. Who you are on the inside and what you think of yourself will determine how you show up and the results you get.


So, enjoy the process of exploring who you are, and who you want to be and then have the courage to be authentic to yourself. Because you are the one who matters most in your life.